Birthdays

take on a new meaning once you have kids. It's always nice to get presents, and have people make a fuss over you. And if your family is anything like mine, it's an excuse to actually see some of the family members who you don't see much of throughout the year. I come very much from a "birthday's, Christmas's and funeral's" type family. I'm very close to my parents, and my brother and sister but other than that - nada.

Next week its my birthday. It seems a little surreal this year, with Bean fighting to keep going every day, for me to be thinking about my birthday. Because really, this year, it's just not that important.

Lucy is old enough now to LOVE birthdays. More so if they are hers, but she loves anyone's birthday. Particularly if there is a party involved. She can't stop talking about my birthday. Or when Baby Beans birthday will be (we don't know), and about her Grandma Kings birthday which is few days after mine.

The absolute best thing about birthday's when your a parent is when its your childs birthday. Lucy's last two birthdays have been so much fun. It means everything to a parent to watch their child grow and achieve a milestone of a birthday. Counting down the years, watching them grow, its a really special thing.

Which brings me to Maddie.

November 11 2009 was Maddie Spohrs 2nd Birthday. Tragically for her family and friends, she celebrated this birthday up in Heaven, with Jesus and the angels after suddenly and unexpectedly passing away earlier this year.

Any anniversary after you lose a child is impossible. It hurts SO much that time has passed by while your grieving. It sucks that while your world is falling to pieces, that life does go on.

But I know, Maddies parents celebrated her birthday with all her favourite things. The colour Purple, Cream Puffs, flowers and songs. Its just so sad that she wasn't here to join in the fun. How hard it must be to pass the years with anniversaries, and birthdays, with only the memories to guide you through.

Pray for this family, they need it so much right now.